I was approaching middle age (so obviously this was more than a few years ago) and it’s my first visit to the dermatologist. No problems that I knew of, just preventative maintenance so to speak. I’m in an exam room with the dermatologist and I hear him ask: “Would you like a genital exam?” Geez, I think, that’s one of the places where the sun never shines, but in for a dime, in for a dollar so I said sure and dropped trou.
The doctor turns around, looks and asks “What are you doing?” “You asked if I wanted a genital exam.” “No, I asked if you wanted a general exam.” As opposed to what, but I quickly hiked ‘em back up and he focused his exam on the tanned parts of my body, which in those days was a “farmer tan”—neck and arms. I’m sure that the door had no sooner closed on the office than his whole office heard about it. (In my defense, the words don’t sound all that different, especially since the doctor had his back to me when he asked.) Since retirement I spend the summer months in a tee or golf shirt and shorts, so there’s more surface area for the dermatologist to examine.
My annual goal is to go the entire year without wearing a tie, and if it weren’t for two grandkids getting hitched I’d currently be on a 2+-year run. Our church service dress code is “whatever”, ranging from jeans to 3-piece suits and everything in between. Ah, but we’re into August, the ties are still hanging in the closet and not around my neck, so there’s hope.